So there you are, lying in bed, watching a movie you've just illegally downloaded, suffering an annoying cold with a side of splitting headache; and what do you do after the movie is finished? You make a blogpost on how awful it was. But don't fret, I'll comment on the latest Harry Potter flick as well, which I thought was good enough.
The dreaded movie I just watched is called "the last exorcism", being a fan of the whole theme - not the movies, I think every single Exorcist movie in history was a revolting piece of shit - I thought it would be nice to download it. The trailer was so promising...
So anyway, this movie started out swell, it gave the impression of being a documentary where one of those obnoxious evangelical guys who lost his faith is followed through his last exorcism - by way of exposing the whole scammy business. Great stuff I'd say. And the movie really does have the greatest potential with moments of sheer brilliance all through it, though I can't really name any at the moment... ...maybe they weren't so great after all. It's safe to say that in the Exorcist movies there, too, are moments of excellence, great stuff which could have been part of the greatest of movies. But the rest of those were crap so those few scenes of actual movie delight are smothered in poo. Anyway, to the storyline... As the pastor drives to this place of the people who wrote him a please-come-and-help-my-daughter-is-possessed-letter we get to meet this gorgeous little man with red hair, who tells the good pastor to make a u-turn and go back to wherever he came from. After the pastor says 'no thank you,' and continues to ask someone else for directions, the boy throws muddy rocks at the vehicle he and the crew are sitting in. The boy turns out to be the possessed girl's brother and after discovering the pastor is a conman, which doesn't take long, he, strangely, says he has no problems with him anymore. The eerie attitude and twist of mental illness captivated me and I started warming up to the boy.
The pastor tries to exorcise the demon from the girl, twice. Before he exorcises her again she is shortly hospitalized because she looks like hell, as in mental breakdown. Not surprising since, throughout the movie, we get a clear sense that something is not functioning properly in that home. Turns out she is pregnant. As pastor-guy drives back, firm in his belief that the father raped his own daughter, there is some struggle during about ten minutes, after which the dad tells the pastor that if he doesn't exorcise his daughter, he will do so himself. Flash-back moment from the woman in the crew, she reminds the pastor (but obviously aimed at the movie-watcher) that her only salvation is death, or exorcism; suggesting her father means to kill her. So pastor-man decides to exorcise again. Somewhere along the girl cut her brother's face (the cure red thing), who is then taken to hospital by daddy. You can imagine my inner nurse fantasy went wild and I stopped paying much attention for a while. There are a lot of screams and stuff and she takes the camera from the crew at some point giving us a good picture of how she kills a fluffy cat.
The movie struggles on like this, with much more shaky camera action, darkness, weird sounds and screaming, until the pastor finally returns to the house for the last scene, where some peculiar ritual is taking place. By the vague chanting, red robe and big fire, we (the viewer) quickly get the idea that this is some kind of Satanist cult. We see the baby being born which turns out to be non-human and it is thrown onto the fire. That seemed strange to me, to kill it, but whadda you know: the creature is burnt and out comes this demon figure in the huge flames. The pastor seems to have regained his faith through this ordeal and starts praying and eventually walks up to the demon while holding his special-effects-crucifix in hand (it is shown how it puffs up smoke when a button is pushed, one of the exorcism tricks). It is right at that moment that the rest of the crew, the woman and the camera man, get too scared and run off. So we are back to documentary-mode after going through the Exorcism of Emily Rose-mode and Rosemary's Baby-mode. Not very effective planning, but I already said this movie stinks. While the camera man keeps his camera panned as he runs for deer life *sigh* we watch the bitch, I mean woman, being chopped into by someone with a big axe. Now all we have left is the camera man, whose face we have seen in about two scenes this whole movie, and his shaking images of sheer darkness. Finally we are released from our torment by, praise Jesus, the ginger boy, who is remarkably well dressed for a satanic killing machine. It's a pity the bandage is still on his face, but I guess the contrast is artistic enough. We hear a slicing noise and the camera man is dead. THE END.
What I hated most about this movie is how it fails to be what it makes you hope it is from the beginning. I was so looking forward to a documentary-style movie on the scam that is exorcism. When it turned into another Exorcist movie I was like, sure, great intro, let's go. But when it turned into Rosemary's Baby and then went back, in a last attempt at saving whatever was left of a story, to documentary-style - I was unhappy.The movie had the greatest potential, and had lots of good stuff in it, but eventually it failed to deliver. Though it is a somewhat nice story with lots of stuff people will be familiar with, it got my hopes up and turned into a mediocre production.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, on the contrary, did live up to expectations and it can safely be said it is the best so far in the Harry Potter collection. Though this was just part 1, I'm quite confident part 2 will be the climactic ending we all are waiting for. The fact that they tore the thing in two bugged me, but since they made this into such a good movie, I can well understand they don't want people to sit it through in 5 hours straight. I like how the actors are becoming adult, the bad shave on Harry and Ron is particularly nice. Ron turned into quite the treat in this movie, though his boy-loves-girl antics keep me focused on the bigger storyline.
Yeah, ride that pole!Not all T-shirt slogans are bad. And yes, I definitely would.
Though I generally hate cliff-hangers the one at the end of this part1 was to be expected. So I guess I don't blame the makers of this movie for it. This movie was good. There was loads of action, a good plot, a fair sequel to all its predecessors and, now that the actors are buffing up into adulthood, much more nudity. Heck, Harry almost bares all when taking a jump into freezing water. If you haven't seen it yet, I would really recommend it. The Harry Potter movies have gone from mediocre to good, and from good to quite amazing. Looking back at the Philosopher's Stone, I think the movie series, much like the actors, we growing into adulthood and thereby became much more jummy.
This leaves me bidding you a splendid new year and I'd just like to bring mr. Allen Clippinger to your attention. His name is a bit odd, but he compensates with muscle. Quite the hunky type, I think his body is rather over the top, but to be honest, I don't think I'd care that much. See you later, hopefully within less then a month-and-a-half, which is the time it has been since my last post. A damn shame.
I support several charities, some physically, some financially. The Red Cross and Humanitas are charities not listed here, because they don't provide suitable banners. Those two are the ones I support physically, I'm a medic for the Red Cross, and a didactic coach for Humanitas. The four listed below are, or have been, supported by me financially. I do not support humans outside the borders of my country, apart from human rights. Everything else in nature does have my concern.
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